The Birth Japan lucky bag can transform anyone into a Japanese bad guy instantly

Full villainous fashions at a fraction of the price!

Although it’s still a good week before the end of the year, we’ve been seeing a lot of year-end fukubukuro or “lucky bags” arriving early in the form of fukubako or “lucky boxes.” These are when a retailer ships the lucky bag directly to homes, especially to prevent large crowds from gather during the pandemic.

This time, a lucky box arrived at our writer Masanuki Sunakoma’s home from Birth Japan. As we’ve seen before, Masanuki has often flirted with the dark and dangerous side of society, getting bad-guy haircuts and flamboyant Coming of Age Day kimono.

So Birth Japan was the perfect source for his ideal lucky bag. In fact this is his third time purchasing one from there.

▼ 2019

▼ 2020 (accessories courtesy Taco Bell)

As you can see, this online retailer specializes in fashions geared towards bad guys of all stripes, from yankees to yakuza. Their lucky bags are especially wicked and boast an 85 percent satisfaction rate among their clientele. That might seem a little low, but considering Birth Japan caters to street fighting men who can’t get no satisfaction, it’s actually pretty good.

This year, Masanuki got the Kanzen Do Akuto Fukubukuro (Total [Bang!] Villain Lucky Bag) for 8,888 yen (US$78) before tax. It was about twice as much as his previous two outings, but this bag is said to contain 38,000-yen worth of Japanese bad-guy fashion.

Masanuki excitedly dug through the box and pulled out each item. First came a pair of mirrored snakeskin sunglasses. Alright! Off to a good start.

Next came a dog tag pendant with an ambiguously stylized fleur-de-lis. Yes, you got to have one of those.

There was also a bracelet that resembled prayer beads. This a great way to add some depth to Masanuki’s bad guy persona. It shows he’s not just about punching people’s faces in, but has a spiritual side too. Perhaps he acquired it that one time a Mori-clan goon tossed a hand grenade into his hideout, but he survived completely unharmed.

There are also some packs of tissues decorated with various cutthroats and psychopaths, as well as a handwritten letter.

“Dear customer,
Thank you very much for purchasing our product. My name is Noguchi and I was in charge of processing and shipping your order this time. As much as possible we try to send prompt responses, but did you find that our response was slow and it inconvenienced you? Were there any defects, mistakes, or missing items in the products or packaging? If there is anything wrong, no matter how trivial it might seem, please don’t hesitate to contact us. Our staff will continue to work hard together so that we can bring smiling faces and satisfaction to our customers through our products. Thank you for your continued support.”

There was also another letter inside, this time from a gruff-looking company representative by the name of Ishikawa. It basically had the same message, but written in a less flowery way, and with a style typical of Japanese gangsters, such as an excessive use of kanji characters.

And last but certainly not least was the centerpiece to this lucky bag, a full matching outfit from the label Blood Money Tokyo. It was made up of a long T-shirt, hooded sweatshirt, and sweatpants, all in a royal blue-and-gold design.

Masanuki thought this was perfect, not only for making him look like an authentic street tough, but also as a guaranteed way to ensure social distancing with other people on the street.

▼ Masanuki: “Masanuki is dead.”

▼ Masanuki: “They call me ‘The Nook’ now.”

▼ Masanuki: “And you’re late for your payment, yaro.”

Although it was a frigid late-December day, the weather was no match for the ice water running through The Nook’s veins.

On second thought, factoring in wind chill, it was kind of cold, so The Nook put on his Blood Money hoodie.

The chains on his clothes represented both the shackles of society and his bond to his clan, they were burdens that kept him from his true passion of photo editing. Nevertheless, his mind was free because he lived by his own rules based on honor…and blood.

And yet he was also a man who sought peace both in his mind and throughout his turf. You could tell that because he wore a bracelet that kind of looked like prayer beads.

He was a provider to his people and defender of his land, much like he believed the noble Navajos to be.

Although his brief stint in an underground pit fighting circuit ended in two losses and zero wins, he remained a legend on the streets. That’s where the real fighting happens and anything goes.

You too can be a legend in 2022 just like The Nook by picking up a lucky bag from Birth Japan while supplies last.

Related: Rakuten/Birth Japan
Photos ©SoraNews24
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