Twitter user plays God with unholy cat and Roomba fusion

21:18 cherishe 0 Comments

Some Twitter users just want to watch the world burn. Others want their personal vacuum cleaner to have an unnerving cat’s head atop it at all times.

There is just something so dreadfully compelling about the idea of breaking two things down to their salient parts and then recombining them into something bigger, better and more powerful. Sometimes that’s as simple as two great-tasting foods that are combined into one product, sometimes it’s as complex as smushing an animal and a fruit together and turning it into a plastic toy.

Kids’ shows like Steven Universe and Dragonball Z are quick to show us how teaming up with a fusion dance can help us save the day:

Sometimes, though, we go too far in our quest for power. Sometimes we play with the rules of nature too quickly and easily.

Sometimes, we create monsters.

Twitter user @sacocho proudly displayed one such creature, and the Japanese Internet promptly cowered in terror at man’s hubris.

▼ “A fusion of a cat and a Roomba.

#FantasyCreatureAnthology #MAkeAFantasyCreature #Wool #WoolFelt”

The creature in question is filmed entering the room, slowly, steadily and with an increasing sense of menace. Its eyes contain no light or reason. It moves like a tragic ghost towards the camera, the fur on its right-hand side rippling erratically as it goes. What does it want? Where will it go from here?

We are given no answer.

@sacocho remained remorseless after the tweet’s initial success, posting another image.

▼ “Thanks for all the retweets! His name is Baroom, and he’s a zero-year-old male cat.”

Wait – it can’t be… This isn’t @sacocho’s first cat hybrid?!

▼ “I got a cat.

#CatRail #FantasyCreature #FantasyCreatureAnthology”

Apparently Cat Rail is a female cat, also zero years old, named “Rel”.

After thousands of likes and a litany of comments begging for explanations (and in some cases, drastic extermination measures), @sacocho posted one last update:

“Thank you so much for over 10,000 RTs and likes.
Right now I only have the two cats, but I’d love to adopt more and more and then maybe open up a limited-time cat cafe with them…
If you guys know of any kind of event space in the Kansai area where I can set that up, it’d really help me out.
Oh, and one last thing.
I’m a dog person!”

It makes sense that a dog lover would only exact such terrible experiments on the feline population. Maybe somewhere out there in the Twittersphere there’s a real-life Shou Tucker from Fullmetal Alchemist doing the exact same thing in reverse.

▼ “Wait ’til you see my next chimera, Edward. It cleans your apartment for you!”

If @sacocho does go through with this scheme for a cat cafe, here’s hoping it’ll be confined to hybrid cats only. We shudder to think how regular cats would react to a man-made disaster like this one.

Source, featured image: Twitter/@sacocho



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