We celebrate Christmas with the worst tree we could find

It’s not the size of the tree that matters, but the balls that hang from it.

Remember that Peanuts Christmas special in which Charlie Brown buys a dilapidated tree only to have it remind everyone of the true meaning of the season? Our writer Masanuki Sunakoma did and set out to find his own crappy Christmas tree to reconnect with the spirit of the holidays.

He knew just where to find it too, and much like he did with his Halloween mask and toilet Santa, he looked up the lowest rated tree on Amazon Japan. The one he selected boasted an average rating of 1.6 stars that cost 2,365 yen ($21).

After placing the order, Masanuki was told that the tree would arrive on 19 December, but much to his surprise it arrived on 7 December. It was a Christmas miracle!

The box was a lot smaller than he’d expected, and it had some writing on it that appeared Chinese. Unable to decipher the message, he used Google Translate’s camera function. It interpreted the handwritten label as “Second Treasure, More.”

Apparently neither Google nor Masanuki could make out the 8”, indicating the size of the tree. Nevertheless, he opened the box and began to pull out his new Tannenbaum.

▼ O Christmas tree

▼ O Christmas tree

▼ How lovely are thy… oh.

It wasn’t necessarily a bad tree, but then again it wasn’t even close to a 2,365-yen tree either. It seemed to have been severely crumpled up in transit to boot.

In anticipation for this festive addition to his home, Masanuki had bought a couple ornaments from the 100-yen shop. Perhaps if he just spruced it up with some decorations, the tree would look nice after all…perhaps?

It wasn’t without its redeeming features, like snow-tipped branches and built-in ribbons and stars. Still, our reporter was one of those old-fashioned types who preferred his trees a little more triangular.

Not a problem though. It just needed a little love from his his green thumb to get back into shape.

Et voila! It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas now.

Next, Masanuki hung his ornaments on the tree. There was just enough space for both of them.

By the way, these balls had built-in LED lights, so it really didn’t matter what kind of tree they hung on. A party was guaranteed to break out either way.

He put his new tree between his other decorations: his Santa figurine calling for help while being buried alive, and the eerie embers of Hell Yule log.

▼ Almost as scary as the trains Masanuki likes to ride.

Masanuki was really lucky that Christmas had literally come early this year, but there was something odd about this purchase. His Amazon account still has the delivery of this item listed as “pending.” Does this mean another tree might arrive on the 19th?

If so, it would truly be a Second Treasure, More.

Source: Amazon Japan
Photos: ©SoraNews24
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